April 26, 1996

I wish I could remember where I put the article.  It was so encouraging.  It made me feel my growing anxiety was unjustified.  It convinced me my memory loss was nothing out of the ordinary, nothing to be overly concerned about.

I just wish I could remember where I put the article.

I remember cutting it out after reading it, thinking it was a source I could refer to later--during those times when one of the people I live with says, "Remember, I told you I was going to Hutch this afternoon." or "Yes, you've been told that shirt does not go with those pants."

I remember thinking that when those situations arose I could pull the article from its safe place and say something like, "The reason I don't remember is that I have so many other important things on my mind."  (I think that's what the article said.)

The article referred to a recently published book by some doctor who has counseled many of the Baby Boomer Generation who are finding their minds aren't as clear as they once were.  They forget appointments, they forget anniversaries, they forget what it was they were saying in the middle of a sentence, they forget...well...they forget other things, too.  The good doctor, the article noted, gives his clients solace, saying memory lapses are natural; they are not an indication that brain cells are dying, they are not an indication Baby Boomers are a stumble away from the rocking chair in the corner.

At least, I think that's what the article said.

Chatting with acquaintances Sunday afternoon, I recognized the dull gaze which flows from the eyes when people have heard the story before.  And I realized that what I thought was fresh and sparkling and captivating, was none of the above because it was a twice-told tale.  The punch line, like a George Foreman uppercut, was aged and ineffective.

Seeing that blank stare midway through my monologue, made me want to pull out that article and confirm to my listeners that I wasn't losing my mind, that my reasoning ability was still intact, that the gray matter was still functional.  I wanted to let them know that scientific research indicates sometimes the brain recalls that first bite of cherry cheese cake which delighted the mouth back in first grade more readily than what was munched for breakfast this morning.

I think the article also mentioned that there are ways to enhance memory.  It listed a couple of things that can be done to avoid those embarrassing exchanges between significant others--"No, you never told me I wasn't supposed to bet our savings account that the Chiefs would win the Super Bowl."  "I don't thing you ever said the Rottweilers were my responsibility."  "You mean we don't have an upstairs bathroom?"

According to the article, there are numerous books written by people whose names I can't remember, which provide clever tricks to help people remember names.  When introduced to a woman named Lucy, for example, the name can be permanently logged by noting that her voice sounds like a goose.  When you see her again and she says hello, her nasally voice will trigger the association "Goosey...Lucy."  If she doesn't speak first, there may be a problem.  There may also be a problem if your memory serves you "ducky" or "adenoid" instead of goosey.

Several years ago, a former basketball player, I can't for the life of me remember who it was, published a book about memory tricks.  He appeared on a talk show reeling off a lengthy list of words and numbers which he had memorized in sequence in a matter of seconds.  It was a stunning display of how the human mind can be focused to store insignificant data for later use.

It almost seems like I bought that book.  I think it's lying around here somewhere.  ~T.Stucky